I am provided with a template that indicates optimum pattern of water as it hits the shower base, a clever device that measures the velocity and, of course, a thermometer.
I then have to test all the variables, making copious notes and creating a flow chart. The length of time the hot water takes to reach the bathroom has to be noted. I stand under the water and alternate between the hottest setting and the coldest. I have a very expensive pen that can write on a special tablet under a waterfall and reading glasses with built-in windscreen wipers. The whole setup cost about £3000, which was money well spent. Going away for a quick break at the weekend has never been an option.
Having taken my readings several times I then dry myself off and sit down with the data, a slide rule, a calculator and MAC, who has had some special software installed to help get the calculations spot on.
When I have checked and re-checked the results and made a call to NASA for confirmation that my maths is up to scratch, I submit my report to the TG.
I have just completed this ritual in the new apartment and the result was:-
"Push lever up at an angle of 5 degrees to the horizontal and wait 46 seconds"
I'm off to the doctor's now as I've either got pneumonia or swamp fever.
