Avid readers, I've had to come up with a new plan so that I can assess the state of the terrible Goddesses' knickers (I am sure you must mean status, Peabrain. Lo, TG Ed.).
[Incidentally I have discovered a new complication. I stumbled across several pairs of black and white chequered pants the other day. This might explain why one moment the TG is sitting on my lap purring and seconds later, fulminating about fumigating the dirty clothes basket, gnashing my teeth and threatening to throw them out of the window.]
The problem is that now we live on the third floor, my stick with mirror attached isn't long enough to sneak a peep through the bathroom window.
So I came up with a cunning plan.
I took the lift up to the top floor, went through the fire escape and abseiled down to the level of our apartment.
Unfortunately it was rather windy; I was blown off course and ended up staring into the bathroom next door.
I now know that the the wife of the President of the Resident's Association has had her hair cut [a bob with a fringe, rather nice] and sports a snazzy brazilian.
I don't think she spotted me as I swung back and forth but I haven't had a chance to talk to her lately because the few times I've seen her in town since, she has always been on the other side of the street; one minute walking my way and then turning about face - evidently having forgotten something poor old thing. She has definitely developed a scurry with a fringe on top.
There is now no alternative - I'm going to night school to learn about body language so I will be forewarned if shin pads are going to be necessary. It will be fascinating to find out what sort of mood is indicated by someone standing in front of me with legs akimbo, rolling eyes, fists clenched and a beetroot coloured face. This, being the most common stance of all, is probably covered in lesson one.
(Happily, foreign languages aren't your strong point, Peabrain. Lo,TG Ed).
Recommended read 'Starting from Scratch' - the memoirs of a STD nurse
