Obviously Ms Rowling wrote all the copies at the same pace and therefore, logically, we will all take the same amount of time to read the book. There can be no argument with this - it's science.
Consequently the TG is more advanced than me which isn't fair.
I have tried diversionary tactics to stop her reading.
1. I set fire to my nostril hairs - "Blow your nose"
2. I pretended there was a mouse in the dirty clothes basket - "Your socks will kill it"
3. I kissed her with my eyes open, holding my copy behind her head - "Stop that!"
4. I broke my leg and asked her to drive me to the hospital, having secreted Harry Potter about my person - "It's an automatic, you only need one leg"
5. I told her I'd won the lottery - "You know my bank details"
I've given up now and I'm so far behind, I think I'll start again.
[I was going to super-glue her edition to the ceiling tonight, but I think she might get suspicious]
(A sea cucumber is more advanced than you Peabrain. Lo, TG Ed.)
