I have been doing a lot of research on appeasement rituals for terrible Goddesses. I have been searching high and low and have come across something that might work.
Apparently, in parts of SE London, as far back as the 1960's, ceremonies were performed during which Marmite sandwiches were presented to Goddesses. These [the sandwiches, not the Goddesses] were, and I quote "....... prepared and offered by virgins . The results were usually good and the outcome positive. The efficacy can be further improved by the accompaniment of a cup of PG Tips made to exacting standards."
I can get the Marmite and the tea, but finding a virgin is proving to be a bit of a problem..
I would be extremely grateful if anyone reading this, who is a virgin, knows a virgin or intends to become a virgin, would contact me - I would make it well worth their time and effort - thank you.
(I think I'll go out and buy a new coffee maker and some gypsy creams- it'll be a long wait. Lo,TG Ed.)
