I have always inspired a short attention span.



I have spent most of my life talking to the backs of people's heads and on occasion have had to chase people so I could finish my point as they accelerated away. (One or two have even put their cars unexpectedly into reverse I notice with hope horror. Lo.TG Ed.)
However hard I try to tell my grouting story or my anecdote about the short-cut I discovered behind the supermarket, people seem to lose interest and try to find something else to do or somewhere else to be.
I have a wealth of stories that are really fascinating and people are missing out.
Well, more fool them.



So I've decided to offer this as a private service only available by email. The charge will be £10. If you would like to receive an email on one of the following subjects leave your email address on the comments page and a promise that you'll send me £10 immediately. There might be a short delay between receiving payment and me actually bothering to reply - no more that 6 months, I promise.

1. Grouting
2. Shortcuts
3. Grouting shortcuts
4. Shortcuts to the grout shop

I can assure you that it will be money well spent.

(I can heartily recommend 3. A riveting read in the best traditions of the genre. (yawn) Lo,TG Ed)