" I was just drifting off, mulling over the blessings that Lo, she is a terrible Goddess had shoved my way during the day, when the bedroom door opened.
A camisole peeped round the door and then waved in her companions. There was a bra, a corset, a basque, a pair of suspenders holding up some stockings that looked the worse for wear and an enormous pair of knickers.
They stood at the end of the bed and just stared at me.
I stared back.
I then noticed, out of the corner of my eye [and do excuse my language here] a GIGANTIC ARSE. It was smiling at me in the lop sided manner that bottoms do. I noticed that it had a maple leaf tattooed on one cheek.
Eyes of newts, frog's intestines and granules of instant coffee started falling all around me. I was worried about the mess. My mind was in a whirl.
I turned over to see if the TG was all right ........... she wasn't there! All I could see was a black shape, like two catapults, with red eyes piercing into my brain and then ......... then ............. I woke up in a cold sweat.
Any ideas?"



"Guilt"

"Oh"

"It might be an idea if I see you again - fairly soon. I'll post you my bill."

.