It’s coming up to that time of year when Lo, she is a terrible Goddess might ask me to wear a posing pouch again, so I decided to give myself a brazilian. (Only if I've had a lobotomy. Lo,TG Ed)




There wasn’t a sharp razor in the apartment so I had to improvise.

I thought of burning a candle and dripping hot wax on the parts to be depilated but thought this might be a tad dangerous. So, I came up with a cunning plan.

I heated up some lard until it was liquid and then soaked some kitchen paper in it. When it had cooled down a bit, I applied it to the relevant areas and stood in front of the open fridge until it had solidified. (Good Lord.The stuff of which nightmares are made. Lo,TG Ed)
I took a deep breath and ripped it off.
Nothing.
Not a single wayward strand.
So, for the time being, I’ve done a rough trim using the garden shears and a lighter to tide me over. Ho hum.

(I've got something that might be more effective, Peabrain. {Rummages in secret munitions store, brings out flame thrower.} Lo,Tg Ed)