I’ve just come back from the supermarket and, quite frankly, there are way too many people out in the community.

There are people trying to go the wrong way round revolving doors.

There are children [yuk] who apparently are allowed to tread on my feet but when I aim a swift kick in retaliation report me to their parents.

There are elderly couples who park their shopping trolley in the middle of the aisle, stand on either side of it and spend hours shaking baked bean tins to decide which is the fullest.

There are people so wide that they carry shoehorns to ease their passage through the frozen chip aisle.

There are people with shaved heads and tattoos that can only grunt [whoops – where’s the delete button].



I’m re-thinking my whole shopping strategy.